Gothic Granola

I just finished watching The Neon Demon , and I had the same squeamish feeling while attempting to eat a cherimoya as I have just now.  Spoiler alert: The Neon Demon involves human blood ingestion. [caption id="attachment_5324" align="aligncenter" width="223"] I'm afraid of blood, but I write about vampires.[/caption]

Good grey, sir. Lord Earl Meow Grey Cat III likes a proper scone.

Much like my sourdough recipes, this recipe's usefulness is limited by the equipment you have on hand.  However, you could very well make this outside of a bread machine.  For the first time in three years, I don't have a gas stove, and a countertop bread machine bakes better bread than an electric oven.   The bread machine doesn't warm the apartment like the oven does, though!

Hey, it's my birthday! I'm going to revel in my Early Onset Grumpiness . via GIPHY  

It's only seventy-four days until Halloween/my birthday, and it's not too early for pumpkin muffins.  Snow is appearing on the mountains and it snowed (briefly, no accumulation) at 11,500 feet last weekend.  

My original favourite banana muffin is cornflake banana muffins , but VGF cornflakes are a treat at USD $7.99 a 26.4 ounce bag.  The below muffins I used to make all the time for my student job folks in a myriad of variations, including using apple butter, more or less banana, various types of nuts and dried fruit, in bars or in muffins.

Hello from 9,000 feet (2,743 meters) above sea level! In between this post and last post , I moved house from the Front Range to the Western Slope.  All TC wanted was muffins once we were in our new place, so I made these blueberry muffins, complete with crunchy sugar on top.

If you have ever read any Buddhist sutras translated to English, you will recognize the title structure:  "Thus I have heard..."

Tiny Carrot! All the kale is gone from the garden; it got eaten by bugs. And now the apartment is filled with ladybugs--where were you a few weeks ago? I also pulled up some tiny beets; clearly the root veggies need more time underground.

This is not a coffee cake in the sense of something that's covered in streusel. Sorry. This is a coffee cake in the sense of a cake that's not quite sweet enough for dessert but is perfect for a mid-morning or mid-afternoon caffeine break. Not sorry. I don't even drink coffee. I have no clue if this will "go" with coffee or not. Pairing sourdough with sour coffee doesn't make sense to me, but I don't make the rules, I just follow them . This is my first time participating in one of these link-ups.

More strawberries and chocolate chips this week. My harshest critic was in town and TC asked me to make him a "moist" baked good (AKA: my other father-in-law, Bandit the dog's owner).

The second paleo recipe of late...what is this madness?! One of my neighbors gave me an entire bag of Nutiva coconut flour, and this was the first thing I made with it. The Wednesday farmers market is usually a little thin on goods, but one vendor offers an "all you can fit" bag for $10. I used zucchini in this recipe from the farmers market.

The "recipe of the week" is another Meowlex request. I was watching the episode of Alton Brown's Good Eats where AB makes cinnamon rolls, a citrus ginger ring, and monkey bread. TC asked for monkey bread, aka: monkey brains, bubble bread, or pull apart bread.  

TC kept quoting this line from  The Venture Bros. when I said I would make muffins on Saturday and ended up making them on Sunday. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IE8J413choE

What you label wheat flour in a half-GF household: POISON!

Cornbread, cornbread, always will be mine... Yeah, that was an attempt to play on And One's " Military Fashion Show ." "Girlfriend's girlfriends never could be mine," girlfriend = GF, GF also = gluten-free, get it? I made so much cornbread (like, a batch a week) when I first became gluten-free in 2011. My recipe then was heavily fruit-based , though I've made other variations since, including applesauce-really-fast , basil-beer , and blueberry . 

These peanut butter oatmeal protein balls have been taking over the interwebs. I put my own twist on the recipes found in Dr. Phoenyx's Instagram and Gimme Some Oven .  

Coconut sugar finally arrived and I got a new Bundt pan! Check out the castle addition to my collection.   (I have the Cathedral and Jubilee Nordicware pans already). Sourdough Coffee Cake and Zucchini Cake .

Donuts gone batty! While I was waiting for Yosemite to install this week, I found these Jam-Filled Coconut Donuts on the Whole Foods Market website. Only WFM would say "jam" not "jelly" donuts, right? The original recipe is neither vegan nor gluten-free, but I made it so.

Laurie Sadowski has done it again. Canadian vegan and gluten-free cookbook author delivers excellent recipes, so I'm just adding a new filling option and an instructions tweak for high & dry altitude.